As girls & women, you are taught to watch out for "stranger danger", when you should also be watching out for people you know. According to the Centers for Disease Control, 20-25% of college women have reported experiencing an attempted or completed rape. Date rape is when you did not consent or say YES verbally to having sexual contact, either because your were drugged, under the influence of alcohol, unconscious, under age, or have a developmental disability. A rapist can be your boyfriend or ex, fiance, husband, friend, acquaintance, classmate, teacher, coworker, boss, family member, neighbor, or a complete stranger. You have the right to say NO, even if you have had consensual sex with this person before. No one is ever entitled to have sexual contact with you WITHOUT your consent. Even if you are drinking alcohol and under 21 years old, it is still considered rape and it is ILLEGAL. If you or someone you know has been date raped the most important thing you can do is to REPORT it to the police. If you don't report the crime, then he will continue raping other people until someone is brave enough to speak out & stop him. Date rape is NEVER your fault- even if you were drinking, drugged, flirting, or leading a guy on.
What to do if you have been date raped:
1- Get to a safe place.
2- Call a friend or family member immediately, so you have someone with you for support and to go to the hospital with you or meet you at the hospital.
3- Call 911 to bring you to the emergency room and do a rape kit immediately. If you think you were drugged, tell them so they can test for "date rape drugs". The doctors are specially trained to treat date rape victims. Make sure you go to the hospital FIRST- not the police station. You need to be medically examined right away.
4- Ask for a FEMALE doctor, female nurse, and female police officer, so you feel more comfortable.
5- Do NOT change your clothes or wash your body in any way before you go to the hospital. Forensic evidence needs to be collected to prosecute the rapist. Your body is the "physical proof" the police need.
6- Have the local police alert campus security if you are in college to report the rape.
7- Seek medical attention for any injuries, sexually transmitted diseases, HIV, and possible pregnancy.
8- Contact your campus counseling center or a private counselor to treat your emotional symptoms immediately. Don't think you can handle this on your own....you need the help of a skilled professional who has experience with rape.
9- E-mail dari@safedatingcoach.com for information about our coaching program on HOW TO HEAL AFTER DATE RAPE. You deserve to have the best treatment available to get through this traumatic experience. Don't wait another minute!
Symptoms after date rape:
Shock, confusion, shame, self-blame, anxiety, fear, tearfulness, helplessness, violated, numb, angry, lonely, socially withdrawn, sad & depressed, nervous, guilty, suicidal thoughts, nauseous, difficulty eating, difficulty sleeping, headaches, stomachaches, nightmares, can't concentrate, flashbacks, substance abuse, self-harming behaviors- cutting, alcohol/drug use, promiscuity, sexual problems, trust issues & relationship problems, etc.
These are all very normal feelings that you might have after a date rape experience. If you have been a victim of date rape, you will get through this once you get help from a qualified & experienced professional. Please don't try to deal with this on your own. The quicker you get the right help, the faster you will feel better and be able to live your life happily. 
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